The Liberal Party's Constitution If Dion Wrote It

Here is a version of the Liberal Party's Constitution if Stephane Dion wrote it. This is a satirical response to the claim the Liberal Party does not have to run candidates in all 308 ridings; on the record I agree, however if we have the opportunity to be able to run all 308 candidates then the Constitution of the Liberal Party demands it as it's the Party's most fundamental Purpose.

Again, for introduction sake, here is the Liberal Party's Constitution if Stephane Dion wrote it:

2 PURPOSES
(1) The fundamental purposes of the Party are:

(a) to participate in the public affairs of Canada by endorsing
members of the Party as candidates of the Party for election to the House of Commons and supporting their election, well you see that only applies to what ridings I want and for what I get in exchange for any deals I make. So really this purpose is more like a suggestion;

(b) to advocate and support Liberal philosophies, principles and policies in some circumstances, it's really tough to call, considering it all depends on where oppositional Party leaders will be running. Liberal principles and policies don't have to be an option in all 308 ridings, 308 is such a large number anyway.

(c) to promote membership in the Party, well we'll see. If a situation arises in a riding or two, we'll sweep it under the rug, and we'll tell everybody principle before partisanship, even if it's someone else's principle.

(d) to raise money to support the fundamental purposes of the Party, hell yeah! This one is unbreachable. Seriously, no kidding. This is in all seriousness a purpose. I know I was kidding around with the other ones, but this one is a keeper. Seriously. THIS ONE REALLY IS A PURPOSE .... seriously.

(e) to provide a forum for members of the Party to have their say and influence the policies and platform of the Party, that is if we choose to.

(f) to coordinate the activities of supporters of the Party, maybe, like we say, these purpose depend on the circumstances. I guess you could call these really oportunities rather than purposes.

(g) to ensure equitable representation of aboriginal peoples at all levels of the Party, well that's only in some ridings. This isn't for all ridings. Aboriginals can be equally represented in 307 or less. Hey I like that, hell-oooo new campaign slogan.